


Daddy’s Little Psycho & Mommy’s Little Soldier

by keh26



Category: The Eagle | The Eagle of the Ninth (2011)
Genre: Language, M/M, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-13
Updated: 2016-12-04
Packaged: 2018-08-22 04:40:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 15,114
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8273207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keh26/pseuds/keh26
Summary: Set in a Black Dagger Brotherhood AU, Marcus is a soldier out to protect his kind and regain his honor by killing the Halfling. Who just happens to be man he's falling for.





	1. Background

This story is one that has been bumping around in my head for a while. It is characters from The Eagle, the setting and a lot of cannon from the Black Dagger Brotherhood book series, and then some of my own ideas thrown in to make things fit how I want. The Halfling idea is actually from a dream I had.

In the book series, there are Vampires and lessers, who are at war with each other. Lessers are basically people who have had the souls sucked out of them by the Omega. They and the vampires are at war because lessers want to wipe out the vampire species. I won’t go into too much detail because I don’t plan on having lessers or the Omega being a part in this story. Because I didn’t want my Halfling to be half lesser, I’ve thrown in the idea of shape shifters to make things crazier. In this story, vampires and shifters have never liked each other, but because shifters and vampires usually stay with their own kind they don’t often fight. They just don’t like each other.

These definitions have been taken from the Black Dagger Brotherhood website glossary (found here: http://www.jrward.com/series/black-dagger-brotherhood/)

Vampires: Member of a species separate from that of homo sapiens. Vampires must drink the blood of the opposite sex to survive. Human blood will keep them alive, though the strength does not last long. Following their transitions, which occur in their mid-twenties, they are unable to go out into sunlight and must feed from the vein regularly. Vampires may not ‘convert’ humans through a bite or transfer of blood, though they are in rare cases able to breed with the other species. Vampires can dematerialize at will, though they must be able to calm themselves and concentrate to do so and may not carry anything heavy with them. They are able to strip the memories of humans, provided such memories are short term. Some vampires are able to read minds. Life expectancy is indeterminate.

Black Dagger Brotherhood: Highly-trained vampire warriors who protect their species against the Lessening Society. As a result of selective breeding within the race, Brothers possess immense physical and mental strength as well as rapid healing capabilities. They are not siblings for the most part and are inducted into the Brotherhood upon nomination by the Brothers. Aggressive, self-reliant and secretive by nature, they exist apart from civilians, having little contact with members of the other classes except when they need to feed. They are the subject of legend and the object of reverence within the vampire world.  
(There have been cases of “civilians” being inducted in if they are worthy and the brotherhood is of low numbers)

Bonding: When males fall in love, they bond with their female, making them feel possessive and extremely protective of her. Their eyes glow in her presence and their bodies also emit a dark, spicy, sensual fragrance used to mark the female during mating as a warning to other males that she is off limits. Mating ceremonies for bonded males include the female’s name being carved into the male’s back and sealed with salty water to show her ownership of him. She becomes the primary focus of his existence. Although homosexuality is rare, gay males bond in the same way to their mates.

The Halfling Myth:

While not illegal to breed with shifters, it is a social taboo. This is in large part because it guarantees the death of the mother and the offspring before birth. This practice has been used in war as a form of psychological warfare so many view it as evil.

The mother and offspring die during pregnancy because, genetically, a vampire and a shifter are very different. They have a different number of chromosomes and so the cells cannot replicate properly. Usually, the baby remains alive until the 7th or 8th month before dying and killing the mother in the process. It is not well understood why the child lasts so long or why they always kill the mother, but the latency of the death has made the event that much more hurtful. 

There has only ever been one case of the child surviving, although it is not known how it happened or why only the mother died. The myth states the child was conceived on purpose and with great love, but its existence is viewed as an abomination on society. The Black Dagger Brotherhood has been given the mission to find and destroy the child. Although the mother has passed, the father has kept the child safe for hundreds of years.

Please let me know if you have any questions or if something doesn’t make sense. :) This is the hardest part for me to write because I’m trying to condense all this that has been bouncing around in my head for years.


	2. History

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On to the story!

They’d never been this close before. Esca and his dad had been on the run for more than 500 years but he’d never actually _seen_ one of them before. Let alone a whole group of five. And they were fast. Too fast for his dad. Wolves never lived this long, but his dad was something different. He’d been born to Vikings and clearly they were something different. He was more than a thousand years old and still fighting for his son. But he was getting tired; Esca had seen it in his eyes. His da turned into a black wolf but lately the canid had gray on his muzzle. He’d heard that when the wolf grayed, their time was limited. His father knew it too.

The sun was about to rise over 1909 New York City as Esca’s father shoved him faster up the stairs of one of the few skyscrapers in the city. “Son, come on. Now is not the time to get lazy.” The man’s voice was deep and gruff, thick with an accent that even Esca didn’t know the history of. Some kind of English, Scottish, Scandinavian mix… They’d come over ten years ago with a group of Irish Immigrants and they’d been able to blend well - at least until the Brotherhood found them here. He’d never understood why everyone was out to get him. It wasn’t his fault he’d been born what he was. He could hear the Brothers rushing up the stairs, maybe three floors below.

Suddenly, they were at the top of the stairs and there was nothing left. There was simply a door that went out to the roof of the 45th floor. Esca went to the door, but paused to look at his father. He was still at the top of the stairs, giving a meaningful look to Esca.  
“Da…”  
“Son, they’ve seen your face. If they escape, the whole race will know what you look like. I can’t have that.”  
“But, da-“  
“Go.” Suddenly the five men appeared, if you could call the huge males that were at the top of the stairs men, seeming just as surprised to find Esca and his father waiting. His father squared his shoulders and turned to the warriors behind him. “Son, go.”

\--------

News had reached the King’s stronghold within a couple days that one aging wolf had taken out five of the King’s soldiers. It was a tough loss, but the Brotherhood could take it. The Halfling’s guardian was gone so he would be easier to catch, and within a couple of weeks there would be a whole new batch of soldiers ready to go.

Marcus had never felt so proud. He wasn’t one of the elite class who had been raised since birth to be a soldier; he’d done the work on his own. His father had made it on his own as well and Marcus wished he could be here. His father had been one of the ones killed by the Halfling’s father that made this even more important to Marcus. His father was a great soldier, to think that an old man had beaten him… He would win back his family’s honor by killing the Halfling.

\--------

Esca hadn’t known what to do now that he was on his own. His father had always been the one deciding where to go and what to do next. He missed his da everyday, so in an attempt to stay close to his memory, he’d sought out a pack of shifters. He’d wanted to get as far away from New York as possible so he’d ended up in Washington state with a small town of Scottish Immigrants. His own pack. Or, in this case, they were probably called something else. _What’s a group of seals called?_ When he’d asked the governor’s son, the man had simply laughed and thrown an arm around Esca. Yes, he’d fit in just fine here.

And fit in he did. Without meaning to, he and the son had gotten very close. Esca wasn’t sure when it had happened, but he was pretty sure he was in love with Liathan. Maybe it was just that Liathan was the first person besides his da to care for him, but the man had become the best friend he’d ever known. Esca had told him pretty quickly that he was only half-shifter, but he felt a little guilty knowing the man assumed the other half was human. He wasn’t exactly lying, but that didn’t mean he didn’t feel like he was deceiving his lover.

Apparently Liathan felt the same way. They had been together for a couple years when Esca felt safe enough to tell Liathan the truth. That had been a mistake.  
“You mean to tell me, all this time, all those “love bites”, were really just you trying not to _rip_ my throat out?”  
Esca winced as the man yelled at him, “No, Liathan, I’d never feed from you without asking… I don’t want to kill anyone, I never have. Yes, I need to feed, but I wouldn’t do it without your consent.” The withering look he’d received had hurt his soul.  
“So what? You sneak around behind my back? Eat whatever you can find until you can manipulate me into being your blood whore?”  
“No, Liathan,” he was begging now, “it’s true, I hoped one day that I would be able to feed from you, but that’s because I love you. I don’t like having to sneak into town to feed. I just… I didn’t want to scare you away. I _love_ you.” He felt like a broken record.  
Liathan bared his teeth, spitting on the ground at Esca’s feet, “Yeah, well since I thought I loved you too, you have until tomorrow morning before I tell my father about you. _Run._ ”


	3. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The start of the modern day!

Esca bounced on the balls of his feet, rolling his shoulders and cracking his knuckles. He lived for these nights, he could let everything go and just focus on beating the shit out of whoever stepped into the ring with him. It was the truth years ago when he’d told Liathan he’d never killed anyone. The same could not be said of him now. These fights weren’t your usual underground fight clubs. Only shifters and vampires showed up to these, and the only way you could win was to make sure your opponent never got up again. He knew he was harder to kill than his opponents, but that didn’t mean that he didn’t secretly hope someone could beat him. Put him out of his misery…

That was why he’d ended up here, after all. After being chased away from his other half, he’d realized no one would have him. He was half shifter and half vampire, but clearly never to be welcomed by either. Hunted, yes, wanted, no. So he’d decided to beat them at their own game. His da had made sure no one (living) knew what he looked like, and the shifter tribes never talked to each other, so he’d moved to the epicenter of the vampires in America. Some shitty little town in up-state New York. It was always too cold here and the winters were dark, but what the hell did he care? He could keep tabs on his enemies and worst-case scenario? They did discover him and maybe take him out.

Suddenly bored with the fight that hadn’t even started yet, he finished off the other fighter – this one some kind of shifter – and headed home. He had to work tomorrow anyway, and even though any injury he got tonight would be pretty much healed by then, the extra energy he needed for that always made him cranky. Or maybe crankier…

\--------

Marcus had been fighting with the brothers for more than 50 years, and even though he’d never gotten around to finding the Halfling, he still loved it. His friends didn’t hold his father’s death against him and he was big enough that none of the public dared to make any comments about it to him. The camaraderie made all the tough days of training worth it. He patrolled 5 nights a week and he was antsy enough that he’d do it every night if the King didn’t insist he needed to rest.

Tonight was one of those nights off. One of his brothers was getting married in a few weeks and tonight was the bachelorette party. He’d been invited to the bachelor party too, of course, but the man had practically begged Marcus to go with his bride and Marcus couldn’t say no. He knew how crazy the males got when they bonded. Even with Marcus there, the man would likely spend the whole night worried sick that something was happening to his bride.

\--------

Marcus looked around Cottia’s bachelorette party, wondering once again how he had been talked into coming along. Not only was he the only man in the party, but also all the other men in the area were strippers… He was gay, he knew it and really everyone knew it, but it didn’t mean he wasn’t worried there were some of his friends who weren’t quite as cool with it as they said they were. He’d never brought anyone home for that reason. There were a lot of big, testosterony males in that house, the kind of guys that humans would assume were on some kind of steroid. Nope, vampires just bred big.

He jumped a little when a sudden guitar ended with a beat and drew his attention to the stage - and his eyes met the dancers’, which he immediately noticed were the color of a stormy sea. And Jesus, those eyes with the messy blonde hair hit buttons that Marcus didn’t even know he had… Suddenly the moment was over, the dancer broke eye contact and Marcus remembered where he was.

_A certain girl she took my hand and ran it up her thigh._  
Marcus’s attention was drawn to the dancer’s hand, which (sure enough) was running up his thigh.  
_She licked her lips and pulled my hair, I fall in love for a night._  
Obediently, Marcus licked his lips without even realizing it and imagined his hands in the dancer’s scruffy hair.  
_A certain girl she took her hand and put it in my lap_  
Marcus shifted uncomfortably, suddenly aware of the erection straining against his jeans. He was pretty sure it was big as a lighthouse and just as obvious. The flush went up his neck and suddenly he needed to get out of there. But he couldn’t leave while the dancer was still on stage… It wasn’t like the vulgar dances the other strippers had done. This dancer definitely had the sexy moves down, but there was something more to this dance, like the man was letting himself show through…  
The moment the song was over, Marcus excused himself to get another drink. He did need another one, but he’d have to make a stop at the bathroom first. He did _not_ need to be walking around sporting a tent in his pants…

After not nearly as long as it should have taken, Marcus washed his hands extra well and then opened the bathroom door - to walk straight into someone. He looked at his dancer’s face and suddenly couldn’t seem to focus on anything except those eyes…  
“Hm, what’s a pretty thing like you doing out here so… unattended?”  
Marcus stared at him, surprised and even more in love with that accent. “Uh, I, um-”  
“Enjoyed my dance? You’re too sweet.” _Oh shit, so he had been caught._ Marcus flushed a deep red but the dancer continued. “You should have come found me. I would have been happy to help you out with that. Not too late, I suppose. You could have another dance if you like…”  
“Uh, I don’t have any money left. I bought the bride a lap-dance…” Marcus was proud of himself for getting out a full sentence.  
The dancer rolled his eyes. “And I’m not a prostitute, darling. To make that blight on my honor up to me, you can take me for coffee after I get off at midnight. Which I believe is the same time your room is set to be done with their party.” He winked, as if this was the perfect plan. “Just go sit by the bar and let them know you’re waiting for Envy.”  
“Envy?” Marcus managed, wondering what the hell was happening.  
“Envy. That’s me.” He leaned in a little, his mouth suddenly very close to Marcus’s despite the height difference. “Although once we’re out of the building, you can call me Esca.”

Marcus was never good at keeping secrets and clearly Cottia had gotten suspicious during the time he was gone. Especially because he’d forgotten to get a drink. She practically grabbed him when he came in the room.  
“Why were you gone for so long? Where is your drink?”  
Marcus tried to look offended but couldn’t help the grin that spread over his face. “I have a date. After the party. The blonde dancer…”  
“You mean the one that was giving you ‘fuck me’ eyes his whole dance?” She laughed at the surprised look on Marcus’s face. “Oh honey, you didn’t even notice, did you?”

Marcus made his way to the bar right at midnight and Cottia was practically bouncing as she left the club with her other friends. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!” She called to him as she left, winking.  
“I get the feeling there’s nothing that girl wouldn’t do…” Marcus turned to find Esca behind him, looking fantastic in red skinny jeans and a tight black shirt. “Shall we?”

“So is this a date, then?”  
Marcus looked up from his Frappuccino. “Didn't you ask me out?”  
“Well you're the one who suggested we actually go to coffee instead of go to your place...” Esca pointed out, sipping his espresso shot.  
“What makes you think I just fall into bed with people?” Marcus couldn’t help the edge that came into his voice. He always tried to be polite, but just because he looked like the hit and run type didn’t mean he really was…  
“You’re not scary when you’re drinking a girly drink.” Esca was smirking over his small cup, “But it's just that people don't usually hang around with strippers for our conversation skills...”  
Marcus couldn’t help but smile. He may be big and scary looking, but it didn’t really fit his personality to act that way. “Hey, mine has ice cream. And your conversation skills are ok so far… Maybe I just like to do things properly and woo someone before going to bed with them.”  
Suddenly Esca was nervous. He seemed to be serious about this and Esca was at a loss for what to do. It wasn’t that he didn’t like Marcus it was just that… “Well if this is a date then it's the first one I've been on for a long time.”  
It was Marcus’s turn to look surprised. “Really? How long?”  
Esca was downright blushing now, “Forever?”  
Marcus’s eyes softened and Esca was relieved to see it wasn’t pity. “Well that is a damn shame. How old are you?”  
Esca stopped to think, “About 500. But I’m not very social and most people don’t actually like me…”  
“That’s ridiculous. They must not even know you!” Marcus said a little louder than he meant. “I mean, look at you. You’re beautiful for starters, but there’s more to you than that. Just from our walk over here I’ve figured out you’re honest – brutally so.” He added with a smile, “You’re smart and have this great, dry sense of humor…” Marcus caught himself and looked a little embarrassed. “You’re just pretty great, that’s all…”  
Any blush Esca had before was much darker now. “Well… That’s very nice of you. I just freak people out, I guess…”  
Marcus shook his head. “That’s ridiculous. Look, I’m the same age as you and I have met plenty of people – and been on plenty of dates – and this is the best one I’ve been on. And not just because this is the first one that kind of started with you dancing almost naked in front of me.”  
Esca grinned this time, feeling more at ease now. “I bet you say that to all the strippers you date.”  
“Hey! I’d never even been to a strip club before tonight. Apparently I had no idea what I’m missing… I’ll have to thank Cottia for suggesting to her fiancé that I come as a body guard.”  
Esca’s laugh was clear and loud, “Bodyguard? What, did he think us strippers were going to carry her off?”  
“He’s a bonded male.” Marcus shrugged with a smile; “He doesn’t make any sense anymore. He’s hard to work with now because he’s busy worried she’s gone out and done something dangerous. Even if she’s promised to stay at home.”  
Esca shook his head. “If he’s as big as you, I wouldn’t want to run into him in a dark alley. You know what I do for a living, what do you two do?”  
“Honestly, we hang out in dark alleys and look for Lessers… So if you’re going to meet any of us, it probably will be in a dark alley. But you’re not Lesser or wolf so you’re probably ok.”  
Esca knew it was meant to be a joke but he couldn’t quite laugh. “So, you’re one of the Brotherhood…”  
Marcus’s smile slipped, “Yeah, is that… Usually guys are really excited about that. Like dating a brother is a status thing or something.”  
“No, no it’s not a big deal, it’s just kind of a lot of pressure, you know? If I fuck this up suddenly the whole King’s guard is on my ass…”  
Marcus laughed at that, “You don’t need to worry about that. You need to worry about my mom. She doesn’t know I’m gay, though, so she probably won’t be on your case. But even my Brothers are a little nervous of her. I love her, but she is very Italian. The stereotypes about crazy Italian women are true with her…” He was relieved when Esca smiled again, “What about your mom?”  
“Ah, she died in childbirth so I never knew her. My dad used to swear I was just as stubborn as her, though, so maybe we aren’t that different.” His smile was gone again and Marcus was mentally kicking himself.  
“I’m really sorry to hear that. If she was anything like you I bet she was great.” He offered a smile, “My dad passed too. He was a Brother and he was killed on the job.” Marcus’s jaw tightened, “There Halfling’s father killed him. But at least he took the fucker out too.”  
_Oh shit oh shit, this is bad._ “My father is dead too. He lived a long life, though. Doesn’t mean I don’t still miss him.”  
Marcus looked up from his ice cream and coffee and offered a smile to Esca, “Not sure how we got on such a depressing topic. Tell me where your accent is from.”

\-----

Marcus was actually a little cranky when Cottia caught him leaving the house right after sunset.  
“It’s too early for you to be going on rounds, so where are you sneaking off to?”  
He faltered, trying to think up a story before realizing he’d tell her the truth anyway. “My date went so well last night that I forgot to get his number…”  
Cottia stared at him for a moment before a huge grin spread on her face and she started to laugh. “Oh, Marcus! That is so disgustingly cute I think I’m going to be sick… Really? You were having such a good time that you forgot the most important thing?”  
At least Marcus looked embarrassed, “Do you think he didn’t give it to me on purpose?”  
Still giggling, Cottia rolled her eyes. “Shut up and go talk to him.”

Marcus lucked out because Esca was working tonight and was already at the club. It was still fairly early in the evening so the club was mostly empty. Feeling weird being here without the gaggle of women from last night, he took a seat at the bar and ordered a drink. He wasn’t sure how to explain it, but somehow he knew Esca was here and even though he didn’t see him, he could wait. He didn’t have to get to work for another 3 hours.  
“Come back for more, have you?” Marcus shivered at the familiar, accented voice that accompanied the hand that ran across his back. Esca sat down on the bar stool next to him in distractingly short shorts and nothing else. “What can I do for you?”  
Marcus looked at Esca’s face, tearing his eyes away from the distraction. “Well. I had such a good time with you last night that I forgot to get your number so we could do it again…” Marcus was relieved to see Esca break out into an honest grin.  
“And here I thought you didn’t give it to me on purpose… Give me your phone and I’ll type it in. I can’t hang out tonight unless you want to wait another 6 hours, but at least text me.”  
Marcus was relieved too. “No, that’s ok, I have to work tonight too, I just wanted to make sure I could reach you.”

\-------

“Hi Mary.” The secretary at the Humane Society of New York met Esca’s smile with one of her own.  
“Esca, dear, so good to see you. You know your volunteer shift doesn’t start for another half hour…”  
Esca shrugged, the bright sun light from the walk over leaving his skin a little tingly. “I know, I came to see Mac first.”  
Mac was the Jack Russell Terrier who had been dropped off at the shelter almost two years ago. He was tied to the front door in the middle of the night and the staff found him the next morning, covered in flees and growling. He’d bitten anyone who’d gotten too close and been too slow. Esca went down the run of barking dogs and stopped to let himself into Mac’s. The terrier barked too, grabbing Esca’s jeans and pulling until Esca picked him up and distracted him with a toy. The dog had never bitten Esca, and he was the only person he knew of who could honestly make that claim. Maybe the terrier recognized the wolf in him?  
“How are you doing today, Mac? You miss me?”  
“Esca?” He turned to see Shelly the vet-tech.  
“Hey Shelly, I just came in a little early to see Mac – what’s wrong?” The techs didn’t usually bother him since he mostly just volunteered to socialize the dogs and try to train Mac. Shelly was wearing a frown that she rarely had, even in the depressing world of shelter work.  
“This is off the record, but I wanted to tell you. Today is Mac’s two-year anniversary of being here, and the board hasn’t seen any improvement in his behavior – what with the biting and all… He’s scheduled to be put down tomorrow before we open. I know you said you can’t take a dog and we aren’t supposed to tell volunteers about the animals slated for death row, but I didn’t want you to come in tomorrow looking for him…”  
Esca’s stomach sank, looking down at the terrier now furiously chewing his rope toy. “Shit. Thanks, Shelly.” She nodded and left, leaving Esca to stare down at the insane dog in his arms. “The ones we love are always leaving us, huh, boy?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not sure how soon I will be posting, I like to try to make the chapters long enough that its worth your time, but as you can see I tend to write short snippets. Plus, I am still trying to figure out just where this story is going, myself! Hope everyone likes it. <3


	4. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay! Just a little writer's block.

“Marcus!” Marcus smiled, starting to open his mouth to answer his mother when he was suddenly wrapped in a hug so tight that he could barely breathe. Which was a little pathetic, considering his mother was barely 5 feet tall.  
“Ciao, mama.” He forced out before freeing himself and catching his breath. “Are you trying to kill me?”  
“Don’t they teach you at that house to come see your mother? Come, come in and eat, you are too skinny, don’t they feed you? Come in! You’ll catch cold out there.” She practically pushed him into the warm and fragrant kitchen. He just laughed.  
“Mama, you ask questions so fast I don’t have time to answer. I come see you every week, that is more than all the other brothers visit their mothers, you know…”  
“Terrible sons! All of them! A mother wants to see her son everyday. Sit! Here, I made you spaghetti, your favorite.”  
Marcus smiled, it was his favorite. Even if it was a simple dish, no one could make spaghetti like his mother. “Grazie, mama. Come and sit with me. You need to eat too.”  
She rolled her eyes at her son, although she did sit with him. When she’d finally decided he was eating enough she calmed down enough to fully look over her son. “You seem happier,” she announced, eyeing her son knowingly. “Did you meet someone? I expect you to get out of that house often enough to get married, you know. That house is too stuffy and they don’t serve you enough food. That’s why I left, you know. I want to be in charge of my own house. Those servants are too nosey, trying to do my job…”  
Marcus laughed as his mother went off on a tangent about how she could clean her own kitchen.  
“Yes, mama, I am happy. But I didn’t meet a woman. I just made a new friend. He is not part of the brotherhood, he lives in town so on my nights off I go see him.”  
His mother looked pleased, launching into another set of questions about Esca. After asking every question Marcus could think of she nodded her approval, “You must bring him to dinner and then I will see if I approve.”

\-------

It was a few days before Marcus and Esca could find a time to meet up. The original plan had been to go out and get a beer at the bar near Esca’s shitty basement apartment, but there would have to be a change of plans. Esca had met Marcus on the corner, since his place was kind of hard to find, and was leading him back towards the building.  
“Hey, I know we said we were going to go to the bar, but if it’s ok with you I was thinking we could take some beers to the park?”  
Marcus raised an eyebrow, “That’s fine by me, what have you got against the bar?”  
“Mac needs to go out-“ He opened the door and the little brown and white blur shot past Esca (who was swearing loudly and trying to grab the dog) and promptly ran at Marcus to attached himself to Marcus’s pant-leg. “God-dammit, shit.” Esca swore, pulling the dog off. “What’s gotten into you? You settled in and stopped doing that!” He looked at Marcus apologetically. “He used to do that at the shelter but he stopped when he came home with me…”  
Marcus was still shocked that “You have a dog?”  
“Yeah, just a couple days ago… I shouldn’t because I move a lot but they were going to put him down and I’ve been working with him for two years…”  
Marcus took a step forward to pet the dog and Esca’s jaw dropped when Mac simply licked his hand. “Why were they going to put him down? He seems sweet, just a little active.”  
“Well, usually his reaction to someone trying to pet him is sinking his teeth into their hand…”  
Marcus grinned at Esca, “Didn’t you say that’s how you react to meeting new people? Maybe he just likes me.”  
Esca leashed Mac up and they headed off to the park. Esca couldn’t help but notice that Marcus was practically bouncing as he walked. He raised an eyebrow.  
“What are you so happy about tonight?”  
Marcus grinned, “Well for starters I’m hanging out with you.” Esca scoffed and Marcus continued. “I also got some good news earlier. I told you how I need to regain my family’s honor by killing the Halfling, right? Well I heard today that it’s going to happen. And apparently relatively soon.”  
Esca looked at him strangely, “And how did you hear that?”  
“One of the brothers has visions. He didn’t see it’s face, but he had a vision that I’d cornered it and I was moving in on it.” He noticed Esca didn’t seem as excited as he was. This was his family’s honor on the line! “What?”  
“I’ve just never heard of visions before, do they come true?”  
Marcus grinned again and nodded, “Yep, always have. V’s special. He’s the son of the Scribe Virgin.”  
“The what?”  
Marcus frowned, “Are you sure you’re a vampire? You don’t know about the goddess who created vampires?”  
Esca shook his head. “My mom was the religious one, I think. My dad still followed his Viking Gods, never talked anything about a goddess… So your brother had a vision of you killing the Halfling?”  
“Yep.” Marcus was grinning again, already distracted away from Esca’s lack of religious knowledge. “And when he has visions they usually come to past pretty soon. He didn’t see its face, so we still don’t know what we’re looking for, but all that matters is that I’m going to find it soon. You still don’t look very excited… This is my life’s work, Esca!”  
“Yeah, no, I know, I just don’t understand what you guys have against the Halfling. I know you said his dad killed your dad, but why did you guys start chasing him in the first place?”  
Marcus shrugged a little, “It’s personal for me, but it is an abomination. Hybrids die because they aren’t supposed to exist.” Esca still didn’t look convinced so Marcus decided it would take some time. “I know you don’t really understand, it sounds like you didn’t have a normal upbringing. What did your dad teach you, if not about our history?”  
Esca shrugged, feeling uncomfortable and just strengthening his reserve that he can’t tell Marcus what he is. “Mostly how to fight. He was raised as a warrior so he thought it was really important I be able to defend myself.”  
Marcus nodded, agreeing with that. He looked down at the dog that was currently running around Esca’s legs. “So how did you end up with Mac?”

\-------

Marcus paced his mother’s hallway nervously. She’d quickly kicked him out of the kitchen when he’d started pacing in there – too distracting she’d insisted. The truth was he was way more nervous about this than he should be. Yes, Esca and he were dating, but his mother didn’t know he was gay and he’d told Esca that so it wasn’t like Esca would say anything. But what if she didn’t like him? He wouldn’t break up with Esca, but it would make things a lot harder… Even worse, what if his very conservative, very Italian mother found out that he was gay and dating a man? He honestly had no idea how she’d react…  
The doorbell rang, shaking him out of his thoughts and he practically ran to answer it. On the other side, Esca was dressed nicely in a pair of slacks and a button-up. He was holding a bottle of wine and grinning at Marcus.  
“Hi.”  
Marcus stared a moment too long and then remembered himself and moved aside to let his guest in. “Hi. Come on in, mama’s in the kitchen.”  
“I brought wine, but I don’t know much about it. So I picked the oldest bottle I could find. That was a good choice, right?” He sounded nervous and Marcus’s heart melted just a little bit.  
“I don’t know anything about wine either. I’m sure it’s great. Come on, let me introduce you to my mom.” He led Esca into the kitchen and introduced his mother, “Esca, this is Maria. Mama, this is Esca.”  
His mother stood and looked Esca over before breaking into a smile and hugging Esca, kissing him on each cheek. “Ah, _bello_ , welcome. Marcus has told me much about you. Please, sit. What is this?” She took the wine and looked it over. “ _Perfetto!_ This will go nicely with the pasta. Sit and we will have the wine with dinner.”  
Dinner was fantastic as was usual with Marcus’s mother and she had done a lot of talking, but Esca didn’t seem to mind. In fact, he looked happy. Marcus wondered if he missed the mother he’d never known. It was stupid, but suddenly he wanted his mother to know about them. He wanted Esca to feel like his mother could be there for Esca too.  
“Mama?” His mother stopped mid-sentence and looked at him, concern rising at the look on Marcus’s face.  
“What, _mi tesoro_?”  
Marcus paused and Esca looked worried too. “I haven’t been honest with you. I, ah, Esca is more than my friend. We’re, um, dating. I like him very much.”  
“Are you telling me you’re gay?” She clarified, not looking as surprised as Marcus expected.  
“Yes, mama…”  
Breaking all of Marcus’s expectations, she smiled, rising to her feet to kiss him on the cheek. “It is about time you tell your mother the truth. I have known for a long time, Marcus, but I am glad you are finally telling me. And I like Esca very much, so I am glad.” She kissed Esca on the cheek too before returning to her seat.  
“You knew?” Marcus asked, his head spinning. “How?”  
She smiled, “ _Tesoro._ You clearly don’t remember this, but when you were very young you were learning about bonding in school. You came home from school that day very concerned and I asked you what was wrong. After some time I finally got you to ask the question that was weighing heavily on your young mind. You said you had learned that males fall in love and bond with their females and you asked if males could bond to other males. I told you it didn’t happen often, but that yes. Sometimes males preferred other males and so they would fall in love with them instead. You didn’t say anything else, but it was clear this was the answer you wanted to hear.”  
Marcus was actually blushing. “You’re right, I don’t remember that. You’re not upset that you won’t get grandchildren?”  
Maria laughed, “Of course I am upset I won’t get grandchildren! But I have known I wouldn’t for a long time and so I have come to accept that. Any doubts I may have had were finished when you were young and we went on vacation with your father. We went to one of the night beaches and he asked you if you wanted to go with him to look at the girls in the bikinis and do you know what you said?”  
Marcus shook his head, trying to ignore how entertained Esca seemed through all of this.  
“You just looked at him and said ‘no thanks!’ before coming back to sit with me.” She laughed, her eyes shining with happiness at the memory. “Your father looked so shocked at the answer but I was not surprised.”  
Marcus was clearly still having a hard time getting his head around all of this and Maria stood, winking at Esca. “I think it is time for dessert. Esca, do you like Tiramisu?”

\-------

They had been going out consistently for a few weeks, long enough for Marcus to learn Esca’s usual schedule at the club. Despite their increasing time together, Esca had been holding back. That wasn’t to say that Marcus didn’t want to take his time and properly woo Esca, but he had a bad feeling it was something more than that. There was something he wasn’t telling Marcus, and that made him need to know even more. It was very obvious to the vampire that he was falling for Esca harder than he’d ever fallen for someone before. He needed to know what was going on with Esca, in large part because he wanted Esca to know that he could trust him with anything. He’d been trying to rein in his feelings so Esca wouldn’t feel pressured, but every moment he spent with the man was getting harder and harder.

So on a night that Marcus was quite sure Esca shouldn’t be at work; he picked up some flowers and headed over to Esca’s flat. He wanted to talk to Esca, to reassure him that whatever it was, Marcus would be there for him. When he rang there was no answer except for Mac barking through the door. Confused and honestly a little nervous about what this meant, Marcus headed to the club. Maybe he was overthinking things and Esca had traded shifts with someone. He left the flowers at the door, just in case Esca came home.

Esca wasn’t at the club either, and one of the dancers who remembered Marcus said Esca wasn’t scheduled tonight or tomorrow. Worried and unsure what else to do, Marcus returned to Esca’s apartment. He felt ridiculous but once he saw the flowers were still by the door, he went to the park across the street and found a bench to wait on. His imagination running rampant, he didn’t want to be directly in Esca’s sight when he came home. Just in case there was something he wasn’t supposed to see…

Marcus didn’t have to wait long, his remarkable sense of smell picking up Esca before he saw him. In fact, if his nose hadn’t told him who it was, he wouldn’t have recognized the hunched over figure that shuffled to the apartment building. Moving faster than Esca could have tracked, even if he had been looking, Marcus was by his side. Esca nearly jumped out of his skin when Marcus grabbed his shirt and pulled him into the light, illuminating the purple bruises on his face.  
“Esca?!” Marcus touched his face gently before his eyes roamed Esca’s body to look for more injuries. “What happened? Tell me who it was, I’ll kill them.”  
Once his mind caught up that he wasn’t going to have another fight, Esca gave him a sad smile, “I’m fine Marcus, and he’s already dead. I just need to get home, have a good steak and go to sleep. I’ll be healed by morning. Just a few bruises and a cracked rib.” He saw the confusion on Marcus’s face and sighed, “I was hoping you wouldn’t find out since I know you won’t approve. Come back tomorrow night and I’ll show you, ok? Tonight I just need to rest.” He winced but stood on his toes to give Marcus a kiss. “I promise, just come back tomorrow, ok?”  
Confused and more than a little hurt, Marcus let him go. Five minutes later he got a text from Esca.  
_The flowers are beautiful. Thank you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who left kudos and comments, they mean so much!
> 
> The story about Marcus not wanting to look at the women in bikinis is a true story. It's how my best friend's mother figured out he was gay.


	5. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for still reading this, we are getting near the end, likely only a couple more chapters!

Marcus was at Esca’s apartment the moment the sun was down. Whatever was going on, whoever was hurting Esca, he needed to know. He’d been a wreck all day, ignoring anyone who tried to talk to him to figure out what was wrong. Finally, he settled on the treadmill in the gym and ran until he might collapse. It was only then he could get in a couple hours of sleep.

He didn’t knock on Esca’s door, sitting on one of the steps going down to his door until Esca appeared. True to his word, he looked completely healed with the bruises gone and the rib apparently fine. Of course Marcus knew that vampires healed fast, but Esca still looked better than he expected. Maybe the brothers should start following his example. Esca met his eyes but didn’t say anything, only nodding and starting off down the street.

Marcus followed him down to the waterfront. It was a dark place, one that he’d only been to a couple times when they were first scouting the area out. He didn’t know exactly what happened down here, just that it wasn’t anything legal. Still silent, he followed Esca around to the back of a warehouse. The backdoor led to something that was basically a makeshift locker room and Marcus stood awkwardly in the corner, still unsure quite what was happening. He watched as Esca stripped down to basketball shorts and put his clothes, keys, and wallet into a small locker. Finally, he turned to look at Marcus.  
“Ok, let’s go. I’ll try to get you a good spot.”  
Whatever soundproofing they had, it was basically magic. Esca pushed open a different heavy door than they’d entered through, and suddenly Marcus was almost deafened. Used to the silence of the walk and the locker room, the yelling of the crowd and the crack of bone was startling to say the least.  
Esca didn’t seem phased, pausing to look back at Marcus. He was trying to keep his face blank, but Marcus could see right through it. Esca was nervous. “You don’t have to stay, if you don’t want.” Marcus looked past him up to the dirt square in the middle of the warehouse. Two men were fighting and based on their speed and injuries, they were clearly not human. Marcus watched for a moment longer and realized one was vampire and the other some kind of shifter. Squaring his jaw, he looked back at Esca.  
“I’m not leaving you here.”  
Marcus didn’t know what the look on Esca’s face meant, some mix of happiness and sadness. It didn’t make sense. They found seats in the middle and at first Marcus thought he and Esca were the only silent audience members. Once he started looking around, he could pick out a few more who were sitting silently in basketball shorts too. Marcus realized they must be fighters. His attention was drawn back to the ring when there was the sound of bone on cement and the vampire was down.  
A small, seedy man that Marcus had missed before came into the ring and held up the shifter’s hand, declaring him the winner.  
“He’s just knocked out.” Esca wasn’t looking at him, but he seemed to know what Marcus was thinking. “It’s not a kill fight.”  
Before Marcus could ask the man in the ring spoke again, oblivious to the unconscious vampire being dragged out of the ring.  
“For your viewing pleasure, we have our first kill fight for the night. On the left is Cujo, and to the right, Envy. Come on down, boys.”  
At first Marcus’s brain just went blank. It was like it short-circuited and he couldn’t move as Esca stood up beside him and headed down to the dirt. Everything went silent as _”Kill fight”_ bounced around his head until suddenly it seemed to hit something and he was deafened once again by the crowd. However excited they’d been about the previous fight, the kill fight was clearly much better. Slowly, he realized the man in the center was still talking.  
“…and it goes without saying they are both undefeated. Ok boys, you know the rules. No weapons, just fists and whatever else you were born with. The fight isn’t over until one of you is dead. Good luck.”  
Under normal circumstances Marcus would have been disgusted at the cowardly way the little man ran from the ring, but these were not normal circumstances. His eyes were glued to Esca, who hadn’t made a move at the shifter, instead circling him and seeming to take stock of the man before him. The shifter was much bigger than Esca, although not as big as Marcus. He was covered in tattoos and with the bandana and wife-beater he was wearing, was clearly trying too hard to look like the terrifying gang member that he probably wasn’t. Marcus knew his type and knew that despite the desperate effort to look scary, the guy probably was dangerous. Esca, though, he apparently knew nothing about. He’d never seen the man fight. Hell, the most he’d seen Esca do was play wrestle with his dog. It didn’t seem like the same person who was stalking around the ring like a predator. Despite all this, Marcus realized he didn’t care. He still wanted to know Esca. Assuming he made it out of the ring, and that was something Marcus wasn’t sure he could watch.  
Marcus didn’t get the chance to leave, because suddenly the shifter had two daggers in his hands and was arching them up towards Esca’s chest. It was clear Esca had seen them and was moving out of the way, but in the way the world had seemingly slowed for Marcus, he could see that Esca wouldn’t make it.  
He didn’t realize he was running. Actually, he didn’t realize he’d moved at all. All he could see were the daggers entering Esca’s chest and going straight into his lungs. The snarl that came out of Marcus’s chest was like nothing he’d ever heard. In fact, he didn’t even realize it came from him until he felt the shifter’s skull crush against the cement beneath his hands. _When the hell did I get over here?_ It didn’t matter. He needed to get the daggers out of Esca and get him to the doctors at the mansion. They were good enough to take care of his brothers and dammit they would take care of Esca. Trying not to think about what he was doing, he pulled out the cheap knives and collected Esca in his arms. They were too low to hit his heart, but a lung puncture could still kill him. As if to confirm this, Esca was wheezing quietly. Although it hurt his heart to hear it, it at least meant Esca wasn’t dead.

The rest was a blur. At some point he’d called home to get someone to rush out and meet them. He needed a car to pick them up _now_. One of the doctors came along and patched Esca up as best they could without all their supplies. Marcus was so wrapped up in his own head and Esca’s shallow breaths that he couldn’t even remember if it was the male or the female doctor. He also didn’t notice the strong smell emanating from him. The one that told every other vampire in the car that the feelings he’d been trying to hold off had come and hit him like a truck. He was so bonded to Esca that he growled when any of the other brothers so much as looked at him. Actually, that probably meant it was the woman doctor. He wasn’t sure he would have let another male touch Esca he was so far gone. The whole night was a swirl of red and black and when he finally came down, he was tucked into his own bed with Esca wheezing softly in his arms. He could tell the smaller man was awake and despite the damage to his lungs, Marcus was amazed at how well he was holding up.  
“You heal fast, especially for someone who is only half vampire.” Marcus kissed Esca’s forehead, grateful the man was doing so well.  
Esca gave a weak smile, knowing Marcus would assume that was because he was injured, not because he didn’t want Marcus to know why he healed so fast. “I always have. This is going to sound weird, but you smell… different. Good.” He added quickly, not wanting Marcus to take it wrong.  
This time it was Marcus’s turn to feel uncomfortable. “Seeing you almost killed triggered my bonding instinct.” There was another awkward pause. “I’m bonded to you now.”  
Esca knew the basics about bonding – enough to feel guilty that Marcus was attached to someone he didn’t really know. But now that he was cuddling in bed with Marcus, it was the first time in a long time that he was glad he hadn’t died in the kill fight. He felt like he should tell Marcus that, but he didn’t want to string the man along. On the one hand, it was clear he could never tell Marcus what he was, but where did that leave him? He didn’t know what happened if a bonded male lost his mate but he had a feeling it was more than just sadness. He realized he’d been thinking for too long when Marcus spoke again.  
“I know you didn’t get a lot of vampire culture growing up, do you know what bonding is?”  
Esca nodded, “Yeah I know the basics, but I don’t know what that means now?”  
“It means whatever you want. I just want you to be happy. More than anything, that is what I want. If you and Mac want to move in, you can, if you want to keep your own place, I understand. Whatever you want.”  
“I bet you say that to all the boys you bring home.” Esca teased, trying to take a little pressure off. It was Marcus’s turn to be quiet for too long. “I was just teasing-“ Esca started.  
“No, I know. I just realized I’ve never brought anyone home before.” He paused and looked down at Esca, “This wasn’t quite how I imagined it going…”  
Esca frowned, “Never? I mean. Surely you’ve dated before…”  
“Yeah, I have. All my brothers know I’m gay and they say they’re ok with it, but I’ve never really wanted to find out if its true… I didn’t want to bring someone home just to find out that someone isn’t as cool with it as I thought.”  
Esca nodded slowly, “Well. No one has done anything to us yet.”  
Marcus gave him a rueful smile. “Well, now that they know I’m bonded to you, no one would dare. A male can actually die if he loses his mate. Sort of a broken-heart kind of thing.”  
_Shit._ “Let me think about what I want to do. I do really like you, Marcus. But I have also lived alone for so long that I’m not sure I’d like living in a big house.”  
Marcus nodded his agreement. “Take as long as you need. Anyway, for now, you need to sleep and focus on healing. I sent someone to check on Mac, but once they realize how bitey he is, they might not want to keep going…”

\-------

Esca ended up going home the next day, feeling better than anyone expected him to. He promised Marcus he wouldn’t be fighting anymore and invited Marcus to come over tonight since he’d already taken it off from the club.

Marcus was lying in bed, watching TV when there was a knock at the door. He was a little surprised when it was V who came in. Marcus thought he had to work tonight.  
“Hey, what’s up?”  
“Marcus, I need to talk to you. It’s about Esca.”

\-------

Esca was washing dishes when the sun went down. Only moments after it sank below the horizon his door busted open, shattering all the locks and flying off the hinges. He nearly jumped out of his skin, turning to face  
“Marcus?”  
There was a look in his eyes that Esca had never seen on that face before. In other faces, yes, but never Marcus’s. He hadn’t even wanted to imagine it.  
“You know what I am, then.”  
“That’s all you have to say?!” Marcus spit, disgust and venom rich in his voice. “You’ve been lying to me, getting me to fall in love with you, and that’s all you have to say for yourself?” He closed in on Esca, a hand going to the black dagger tucked near the small of his back. He stopped a couple of feet away, wrinkling his nose like Esca smelled bad. “What was your plan? Get me to bond with you so I’d protect you from the rest? I could be your little attack dog?”  
“I hoped you’d never find out. That no one would. I hoped to die in the ring so no one would look at me like this again.”  
The pain in Esca’s voice made Marcus angrier, he shouldn’t desire to go to Esca. He’s spent most of his life wanting to slowly gut the man his instincts were now telling him to comfort instead. His hand tightened on his blade. He wanted to kill him, he really did, but his hand wouldn’t obey. His body was frozen in place as he looked down at Esca. The Halfling looked resigned to his fate.  
“If anyone has to do it, I’m glad it’ll be you.” Esca said softly, avoiding Marcus’s eye. "You can get revenge for your father and maybe that’ll help get rid of the bonding.” He paused, feeling Marcus needed to know. “I never intended for you to get attached. When I asked you out it was for just a night. Maybe two. I didn’t want things to turn out like this. I wasn’t supposed to get a dog, I wasn’t supposed to fall in love with you, I was supposed to die alone and not be missed.”  
Suddenly, Marcus realized he wouldn’t be able to do it. He wouldn’t give in to the urge to take Esca in his arms and make him forget everything he’d just said, but he wouldn’t kill him either. It felt like he was being ripped in half. Hand shaking, he sheathed his dagger and looked at Esca with all the anger and hate he could muster.  
“I hope I never see you again.”


	6. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I haven't forgotten this fic! Esca has just been giving me some writer's block. Just a short update to let you know I'm still here and thinking...

Days passed, although Esca wasn’t sure how many. Even Mac could tell something was wrong; the usually hyper little dog had been content to snuggle up next to his person, only bothering him when he needed to go outside or it was time for meals. Esca had never fixed the door Marcus broke, so even though Mac could have squeezed out if he wanted, Esca took him out. Even though the little dog would only live for the blink of an eye to someone who was basically immortal, the fact that Mac was the only one he had left meant he would do whatever would keep the dog happy. Mac deserved the happy, loving life Esca would never have.

Esca was in his usual spot (curled up in bed facing the wall) when Mac suddenly jumped up and hid under the bed. Unusually slow, it took Esca a few more seconds to realize what the dog had heard. Someone was coming down his stairs and moving the door. Frankly, Esca was surprised someone hadn’t noticed the door yet. It was practically an invitation for thieves. He didn’t move, hearing the three men enter his apartment and move through the kitchen. If they were looking for things to steal, they would be sorely disappointed. He kept his cash under the mattress he was currently laying on, and he didn’t have anything else of value. He heard them pause when they spotted him on the bed.  
“Don’t you think if I had anything worth stealing, I would have fixed the door?”  
“We’re not here to rob you. We know you aren’t valuable.”  
“Oh. Did Marcus send friends to finish me off? Well, get it over with, then. Just – take care of my dog, yeah? He’s hiding under the bed.” There was some kind of movement but no answer and Esca tensed, waiting for the blow. What he wasn’t expecting was the rope pulled tight around his neck, cutting off his air.  
“Come on, you’re leaving with us.”

\-------

Marcus wasn’t faring much better although he was at least putting up a better front. He hadn’t fooled it brothers’ though, and if he couldn’t fool them, there was no way in hell he was fooling his mother.  
“Marcus!” He jumped, realizing his mother had been talking to him.  
“Sorry, mama. I’ve had a rough couple of days…”  
She frowned, studying her son for a moment, “Now you haven’t told me what is wrong, but I think this is about Esca, no?”  
Damn, his mother was smart. “Yes, mama. It is… I found out – I found out that he has been lying to me. He isn’t who he said he was.”  
“Well that is rude of him. Do you want to tell me what happened?” To her surprise, he actually did. Spilling out the whole story (minus the meeting him at a strip club, his mama didn’t need to know that) and ending with the realization that he couldn’t kill Esca, even though part of him wanted to, and how his brothers knew better than to intervene. He may want to kill Esca, but there was no way he would let anyone harm him.  
Maria eyed her son, her look both sad and concerned. “Marcus, have I told you how I met your father?”  
“Yes, mama. You met him at church.”  
She nodded, “Yes, I did, and I fell in love with him almost instantly. He was everything I had wanted in a husband. Do you know any vampires who attend human churches, besides me?” Marcus shook his head, trying to pay attention despite his racing mind. She continued, “I never knew anyone else either. It is hard for me to attend church because of the sunlight, but I was born and raised in a small town in Tuscany and all my school friends went to church and I, too, wanted to go so badly – that was before I transitioned and couldn’t go outside during the day, of course – and so it was usually only during the winter I could attend, and even then it was only the occasional winter mass. But one night, there was a traveler coming through who also chose to attend Christmas Mass. Of course, no one else in the church knew what he was, but I did the moment I saw him. Now you know I believe in the Goddess as well as the Catholic God, but do you know the chances of me meeting one of the only males – probably the only one – who shared my beliefs and also just so happened to be everything I wanted in a man?” Marcus shook his head, not understanding why they were having this conversation. “About zero. But I did. I am telling you this because I want you to realize that fate has plans for you. You meeting your arch-enemy and falling for him is proof of that. Esca may not be your destiny, but that needs to be your decision. I miss your father every day, but I have made peace with his death. He would want you to do the same, and destroying your chance at happiness for something that happened more than 100 years ago is not making peace with his death.” She paused to meet Marcus’s eyes, “You need to decide if Esca is that happiness.”  
Marcus nodded slowly, his mind confused and frankly scared. “I’m sorry mama, but I think I need to take a walk.”  
She nodded, standing up. “Yes, you do. But come back for dinner soon.”

\-------

Marcus quickly lost track of time as he walked. Not only that, but he didn’t notice where he was going until he stopped at the bench near Esca’s apartment.  
“Fuck.” He’d ended up basically at Esca’s doorstep. If that wasn’t his answer then he didn’t think he’d ever get one.   
Marcus nearly jumped out of his skin when something bit his ankle. He looked down and at first didn’t recognize the dirt-crusted, skinny dog below him. “Mac? What the hell?” He picked up the little dog, cradling him gently and ready to figure out what the hell was going on. Esca wasn’t the type to let anything like this happen to his dog.  
Marcus headed to the apartment, feeling his stomach sink when he noticed Esca had never fixed his door. Now it was just leaning against the frame with just enough space for Mac to squeeze through.  
“Ok buddy, let’s head home and get you cleaned up. Then we’re out to find Esca, ok?”

\-------

Esca moaned softly when he was tossed unceremoniously into a small wooden chair. He still wasn’t sure who, exactly, had him this time but they hadn’t held back when they’d beat him. He was pretty sure they were shifters, but he wasn’t sure what he would have done to piss off any shifters lately. Not that anyone really thought they needed an excuse…  
There was the sound of a door slamming and Esca looked up just as the familiar voice reached his ears.  
“Esca, I didn’t think I’d find you again.”  
Esca’s brow furrowed, whatever he was expecting, it wasn’t “Liathan?”  
The man had aged in the past 100 years, but he didn’t look as old as his father had been when Esca lived with them. The surprise visit from his past made him more nervous than he would have been had this been a stranger. “Why have you been looking for me?”  
Liathan gave him a cruel smirk. “I was hoping you would ask. See, the more I have thought about what you did to me, the more I’ve realized. It wasn’t just be betrayed. It is everything we stand for. You are a traitor to your own kind. Well. You don’t have a kind. Your father was the traitor, but you are still a betrayal.” Liathan strode forward, pulling a knife and stepping behind Esca. Liathan grabbed him by the hair and pulled him from the chair. “I want you to see this.” He tugged Esca around so he could see the wall behind him – which was actually a mirror. Liathan landed a sharp kick to his knees and Esca fell to the floor, only the rough hold on his hair keeping him upright. Liathan leaned down, his mouth near Esca’s ear. “This is what happens to those who betray their people.”  
Esca flinched, feeling the blade slice through his throat, cutting through his flesh, arteries, and windpipe. His breathing became labored as blood poured down his throat and into his lungs, but he knew it wouldn’t be enough. This wasn’t the first time someone had tried to cut his throat and it hadn’t killed him yet. Liathan released his hair, letting Esca slump to the floor. Esca could feel his eyes on him, waiting to see Esca’s breathing stop. But Liathan would be disappointed and soon he realized that too.  
“That doesn’t kill you?”  
“No.” Esca’s voice was weak and gurgled, but Liathan understood.  
“So Cujo didn’t kill you because you are hard to kill, not because you have a vampire brother under your thumb…”  
Esca made a sound that was meant to be a bitter laugh, but sounded more like a choking dog. “I don’t have anyone under my thumb. I’d actually thought your thugs were the Brothers coming to finish me. At least I’d hoped. I don’t know how to die. And it’s not for a lack of effort.”  
Liathan was studying him, already hearing how his voice was clearing. “Drowning?”  
“Been tried. I also jumped from the 49th floor the night my da died. Broke both legs but obviously ok.”  
His captor was frowning again. “Well keep thinking. Because you’re not leaving here unless you’re dead.”


	7. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We're getting near the end! Now I just need to figure out how to wrap it all up...

Marcus paused when he felt a presence behind him in the previously empty warehouse. Spinning around, he was surprised to see Cottia.  
"Hey. Does Lutor know you're here?" He knew she wouldn't appreciate being treated like the kept woman of his Brother, but now that he knew how Lutorius felt when he worried about her going out alone he couldn't help it.  
Cottia rolled her eyes but otherwise kept her comments to herself. "He's working. I came out to talk to you. Marcus, I know you're worried about Esca, but clearly just blindly charging around town alone isn't working..."  
"What am I supposed to do?" He interrupted, "go beg the king to reverse the royal decree that puts a price on his head just because I have a crush on him?"  
Cottia let out an exasperated noise. "It's not just a crush and we both know it. Everyone in the mansion knows it because you wander around in there like a ticking time bomb when you're stuck inside during the day. You need to go home because I am such a good person that a few days ago I took it upon myself to speak to the king on you and Esca's behalf. And if you were to ever show up back home, he said he's made a decision."  
Marcus stared at her, "Cottia, you didn’t.... thank you." He hugged her tightly, silently wondering how he'd survive without her.  
She seemed to think the same thing, smiling as she squeezed him back. "You are so lucky you have me."

\-------

Marcus made it home moments before Cottia, rushing up to the King’s office and practically bursting in. He stopped, feeling awkward when he realized that not only should he have knocked, but also the entire household was crammed into the room. It was a big room, but it was also a big house.  
“Ah, you were looking for me, sir?”  
The blind King looked at Marcus, focusing directly on him despite not being able to actually see him. “There you are. I should have known Cottia would find you. Come in, join the meeting. It was just recently brought to my attention that you haven’t been going on your rounds and you didn’t even tell anyone where you _were_ going… I expect better out of my men than disappearing every night the moment the sun rises.”  
Marcus blushed, “I’m sorry sir, I didn’t even think about it. I was just so distracted-“  
“I know.” Wrath interrupted, not unkindly. “Lutorious saw Cottia playing with the Jack Russell and we were able to put the pieces together. But you still should have come to me.” Marcus opened his mouth to speak but the King went on. “Many of us have lost our mates at one point or another, and it has always been the Brotherhood’s first priority to get them back. When I lost my Beth, I couldn’t focus on anything else. That is no way to live and I don’t want any of my men living that way, either. Now that you’re here, I can finally make my announcement, although I was hoping to tell you first, Marcus. As of now, the bounty for the Halfling’s head is off the table and Esca is officially under my protection, just as the rest of the Brother’s mates have always been. Marcus, the mission for today is to find Esca, and I think I can help you do that.”  
Marcus’s head was spinning with relief, although he would never quite feel _better_ until he had Esca back. “Thank you, sir.”  
Wrath smiled, “Your mate is our family, too. You would do the same for us and you deserve no less. Now, to find Esca…”

Marcus listened to the instructions, finally promising his agreement when the King kept insisting that Marcus needed to text them his location before rushing in to play the knight in shining armor. He didn’t know what he would find and it was vital for his and Esca’s safety that the whole Brotherhood is there. Marcus went out to the gravel courtyard in front of the mansion and forced himself to relax. The King had said the key was to find that part of your mind that wasn’t yours. If he focused he should be able to get a feel for Esca’s mood, and if he latched on to that, he should be able to dematerialize to within about 50 feet of Esca. The problem was calming his mind enough to find that part. It would get easier the closer he was to Esca and the longer they were together, but being so far away and still at the early stages of their relationship made it all the harder. Oh, and the panic. That made things _really_ hard.

Finally he was able to pick up something, but it wasn’t good. It was this sticky darkness that seemed to grab on to Marcus and try to drag him down. Whatever it was made the vampire just want to curl up in a hole and die. Yeah, this was bad. But it was a feeling Marcus had never experienced before, so it had to have been Esca. Closing his eyes, Marcus cleared his mind of everything except that sickening feeling and felt himself start to drift away with the breeze. When he felt solid ground beneath him again, he realized he was standing on the roof of an old, abandoned-looking farmhouse. He could tell Esca was close, though, so it must not be too abandoned. He quickly texted his coordinates to the King before quietly jumping from the third story roof to the ground below. As he headed for the front door, the Brotherhood started to appear behind him. Yeah, his Esca was in here and he was going to get him back.

\-------

All he'd done for days now was sit in this miserable chair and stare at his reflection in the mirror. He'd watched as his throat healed from Liathan's cut, he'd watched as it took two of the biggest shifters he'd ever seen to get the ax out of his neck when they'd tried beheading him, and he'd wondered what the hell his bones were made of that they wouldn't yield to a steel ax.  
A few days ago, a triumphant Liathan had arrived with a book he'd ordered. It had been about terrible ways they'd killed people in history. From the blood eagle of the Vikings to impalement made famous by Vlad, it didn't take long for Liathan to realize this book wouldn't be of much help. They had at least tried the blood eagle, but when they couldn't cut through his ribs (you'd think they would have learned after the ax) the man got frustrated and just gutted him instead. Thankfully, Esca had blacked out for most of it, but when he woke lying on his back in a puddle of blood next to a pile of intestines, he'd been able to put the pieces together.  
Now here he was, his stomach smooth and unblemished, as if he hadn't been tortured for the past week. Staring into the mirror at the sunken face and hollow eyes in his reflection, he truly understood what others had always seen in him. His survival instinct had been too strong to allow him this before, but now even his will to live was truly gone and he could see himself for the monster he really was. Liathan and everyone else had been right, there was a reason every other Halfling had died before birth. He shouldn't be here, he should be dead just like his two parents who were too stupid to see what they were doing, to see the monster they'd created.  
Esca didn't look away from the mirror when the door opened behind him. It was Liathan's voice this time.  
"Well, I didn't want to do this before because it would make a mess that would be hard to clean up, but I'm out of ideas." He set down something that Esca recognized as a gas can and his heart rate spiked. He may want to die, but fire wasn't the way. Most people die from smoke inhalation, but he wouldn’t. If it killed him, it would only be the flames themselves that would burn him away. Yes, he wanted death, but he didn't want his last memories to be the smell of burning flesh and the feel of his skin melting.

\-------

Marcus hadn’t even opened the front door before he smelled shifters. That didn’t really answer any of his questions, but there was no time for that now. As his hand reached for the doorknob, the feeling in his head changed. It was still the dark feeling from before, but this time there was fear mixed in there too. As Esca started to panic, so too did Marcus. Patience and stealth was no longer an option as he smashed through the door and immediately started looking for the stairs. He didn’t know where he was going, but something in his head was telling him to go upstairs. There were surprised shifters in his way, but he let his brothers handle them, crashing his way through everyone with a strength he’d never known before. He was halfway up to the third floor when he heard a door at the top of the stairs close and the smell of gas, smoke, and flames met his nose. The shifter stopped at the top of the stairs, not seeming surprised to see him.  
“You must be the vampire I heard about that beheaded my assassin. Shame, although I should have known someone who called themselves Cujo wouldn’t be all that good at what they did.”  
In the movies, the good guy always stops to have a conversation with the bad guy, so he can gloat about how the hero is too late and tell him all about his genius plan, but Marcus didn’t have time for this shit. Pain mixed with the fear and darkness in his head and he realized that the flames were where Esca was. Subconsciously, he’d known that, but his mind hadn’t wanted to accept that. Without waiting for Liathan to continue his gloating speech, Marcus charged him and took him to the ground. So full of adrenaline, it only took one squeeze for Marcus to crush his windpipe and before Liathan had even finished exhaling his last breath Marcus was crashing through the door. The shifter hadn’t wasted gas, pouring it only around the wooden chair and on Esca himself. Refusing to comprehend what he was looking at, Marcus grabbed the whole flaming mess and desperately tried to think of where he might find a shower in the house. It hurt like a bitch, but Marcus found a bathroom behind the 2nd door he tried, hurdling himself and the fire into the shower and standing under the icy water as the flames went out. No longer having any control of his emotions, Marcus threw the blackened chair out into the hallway and clutched Esca close to him as they both stood under the cold spray. Well, Marcus stood. The only reason Esca wasn’t crumpled on the ground is because Marcus was holding him up. The prick of pain was no longer in his head, but the dark, consuming feeling was still there and Marcus didn’t like it.  
“Hey, I got you. You’re ok, I got you.” He looked over Esca as best he could, realizing they were lucky. The gas had soaked into Esca’s clothes but hadn’t burned his actual skin too badly, so Esca should be in pretty good shape. Except that he wasn’t talking…  
“Esca, you’re ok. I got you. Everyone is here, we came to get you. I realized how stupid I’d been and I went to find you but you were gone and Mac came home with me and I’ve been looking all over for you but I’ve found you now and I got you. I’m never letting anything happen to you again.” He pressed his lips to Esca’s temple, hoping that would somehow get through what he was trying to say. It apparently woke something up in Esca.  
“You shouldn’t have bothered.”  
Marcus was actually stunned into silence by the words spoken by that quiet, scratchy voice.  
“I – what – Esca! Of course I should have! I shouldn’t have been so stupid to fuck things up in the first place-”  
“No, you were right. Everyone was right, you should have left me here.”  
Finally Marcus could understand the feeling in his own head. It was someone who had completely given up. Even when Marcus had rescued him, there was no flash of hope or happiness, it was the same, muggy feeling of wanting nothing but death. They’d broken him. _No, you’ve broken him. Remember when you went to his apartment? He hadn’t fixed the door you’d broken, there was no blood or sign of a struggle… They came for him and he didn’t fight because YOU broke him…_  
Marcus swallowed down a small, choking sound and forced himself back into his soldier façade. This wasn’t something where he could swoop in and everything would be great again. Esca was broken - he’d broken him - and even if Esca ended up leaving him, Marcus would fix what he’d done.


	8. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally we've reached the end!
> 
> Thank you so much to everyone who has read this, every comment and kudos means the world to me.

Esca’s burns had healed slowly, suggesting to everyone that fire may actually be the thing that kills him. Not that Marcus wanted to know that. Esca hadn’t been speaking since he came back. Not unless he was spoken to. He had been seeing Mary, the mansion’s resident psychologist – because damn, did this house need mental help – and while he was pretty sure Esca wasn’t the worst case she’d seen, Marcus couldn’t tell if there had been any progress. Esca hadn’t opened up about his sessions and Marcus didn’t want to push. If Esca wanted him to know, he’d tell him. So Marcus went out and patrolled, secretly relished the fights that allowed him to take out anger and frustration that had settled on his chest, and came home to spend the days with a usually silent Esca. It was getting to the point where Marcus was trying to think of questions just so he could hear Esca’s voice.

So it was a surprise when one day Esca returned from his meeting with Mary and spoke to Marcus without any pushing. “Mary wants to start seeing you too.” Marcus opened his mouth to argue so Esca continued. “I told her about you. How you don’t seem ok, either. She thinks it would be good for you to talk, too.” Marcus frowned, _Esca talked about him?_ The Halfling didn’t seem to blame Marcus for what happened, but that didn’t mean he felt good about coming up in these therapy sessions. But when he met Esca’s eyes he could tell the man was serious. He sighed.  
“Ok.”  
“Good, she said you should come down to the office and see her now.”  
 _Oh God, was this where Mary told him that he needed to leave Esca alone? He wanted Esca to be happy, but why couldn’t Esca be happy with him?_  
“Esca?” The man looked over at him but didn’t speak, so Marcus continued, “I just want you to be happy. Whatever it takes. Even if that means you leave here and I never see you again.” Esca nodded and Marcus realized that was the best he was going to get.

\-------

Marcus slunk into Mary’s office. Slunk was really the only word for it, looking like a chastised child who was coming to get his punishment.  
Mary sighed, shaking her head and wondering (not for the first time) how she’d managed to get herself into this testosterone-filled house. “Sit down, Marcus. Thanks for coming to see me.” Marcus mumbled something about not really having a choice but sat down in the comfy chair. “Esca said you haven’t been doing well, is he right?”  
Marcus folded his arms and sunk down into the chair, looking even more the pouty child than before. “I’ve been ok. I guess. What did Esca say?”  
“Patient confidentiality.” Mary smiled, knowing Marcus’s angle, “He just said he was worried about you.” Sure enough, Marcus perked up.  
“He did? He hasn’t really spoken to me since he came home… I’ve been trying to think of questions just so I could hear his voice…” He realized how pathetic the sounded and started to change his mind before deciding _fuck it_. If Mary wanted to go shrink on him too, then so be it. “I don’t know if he blames me for what happened but I wouldn’t blame him if he did. If I hadn’t pushed him away he wouldn’t have been alone… When I went to his apartment when I found out he was missing? There wasn’t even a struggle. It was like he just walked out with them. If he knew they were going to kill him and he just went with them… How could I have hurt him like that? I _love_ him but I did that.”  
He looked up and saw Mary was shaking her head. “He doesn’t blame you, Marcus.”  
“What happened to patient confidentiality?” He shot back, not in the mood to be placated.  
“Yes, but it is too frustrating to watch two men fighting themselves rather than just talking to each other like adults. You said he hasn’t spoken to you, have to told him any of what you just told me? How guilty you feel, how you wonder if he blames you?” She could see Marcus was shutting down so she used all she had left. “Marcus, you’re the only reason he comes to talk to me. Because he thinks it makes you happy if he gets help. He has flat out told me that the only reason he hasn’t tried to kill himself is because of you. If that isn’t enough to make you have a serious talk with him, then nothing is.” Frustrated rant over, she looked up and saw Marcus looked panicked. “What?”  
“He-he’s thinking about hurting himself?” Marcus shook his head, the panic still in his eyes. “No, I can’t have that. If he would be happier without me that’s one thing. But he has to stay alive.” Before Mary could get a word out he was standing up and heading for the door. She sighed and barely heard the “thank you” called back to her.

\-------

“God DAMMIT!”  
Of course by the time Marcus got back to his room, Esca was nowhere to be found. Just as he turned to head out on the grounds to find Esca, he heard the shutters coming down over the windows, signaling the arrival of daylight.  
“FUCK!”

\-------

It felt like days when Marcus finally heard the jingle of Mac’s collar on the stairs. Looking at the clock, it had only been a few hours, but they had dragged on relentlessly. Marcus had paced, gotten dressed to go run on the treadmill before realizing if he did that, he wouldn’t know when (or if) Esca came home, and went back to pacing. Rationally, Marcus knew Esca wouldn’t take Mac with him if he was going to do something crazy like kill himself. But after hearing that Esca had been considering it, Marcus’s mind wouldn’t let it go. Every second that slowly ticked by, Marcus wondered if he was going to feel the indescribable pain caused by the death of your mate. He couldn’t even calm down enough to pick up on Esca’s feelings, but that was probably more of a sign of his emotional state than Esca’s.

Marcus shot to his feet and opened the bedroom door, pausing when he saw Esca’s hand was poised to open it. Suddenly, seeing Esca standing there – perfectly safe – Marcus lost any words he might have been saving.  
“Hi.” Esca’s grey eyes stared up at him and Marcus had to open and close his mouth a couple of times before managing a cracked  
“Hi.”  
There was another pause and Esca cleared his throat, “Can I come in?”  
 _Oh._ He was standing in the way so Esca couldn’t get through the door. “Sorry. Where, uh, where did you go?” _Yes, casual was the way to go. No need for Esca to know that I have nearly worn a path in the carpet with this pacing._  
“I took Mac for a long walk. I needed to think and he hasn’t seen the sun in a while. Hell, neither have I.”  
“Oh. Yeah, I guess living with me does kind of make the sun harder to get to.” _Smooth, Marcus. That sentence almost made sense._  
“Yeah. Uh. Look, I’ve been thinking about what you said. And if you want me to leave, I will. But I want you to say it to me. I want to know that you want me to leave.” Esca swallowed and Marcus realized that Esca was preparing for a rejection. Again. Just like everyone else had done to him. Just like _Marcus_ had done to him. And Marcus’s heart broke.  
“No… no, Esca. I just… I thought you hated me. After everything I said to you, how could you want to be around me? I love you and I want to stay with you for the rest of my life. But not if you don’t want me. I know I screwed up and I’ll beg for forgiveness if that’s what you want, I just didn’t want you to feel trapped.” He looked over at Esca and his heart ached all over again. The man looked vulnerable in a way Marcus would have never expected.  
“You love me? Even knowing what I am, the monster I am, you love me?”  
“No! You’re not a monster Esca, fuck. I don’t know why that myth was started, but clearly whoever did it had never meet you. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” Suddenly tired and fearing this conversation, Marcus sat down on their bed. “I just want you to be happy. Tell me what would make you happy and I’ll do it. Anything.”  
Cautiously, like he expected some kind of trick, Esca went over to Marcus. “You make me happy. And if you really do love me, then that makes me even happier. I didn't want to say anything because I was afraid that would be the conversation where you told me to leave.”  
Marcus opened his eyes and wrapped his arms around Esca’s waist. “I really do love you. Forever.”


End file.
